I saw my mother die
Saw her take a drink from a cup that looked like all the others but there must have been a cyanide twist because she never woke up again
That morning when I shook her but she never woke up was the morning I fell in love with women
I searched from that day on for a mother
But then again I didn't have a father either
All I had was a grandmother who liked to forget I was half black because she hated the niggers
I'm the most tragic of all the mulattoes because I never found myself
But a bullet found me and took me to where I wished I was from the day I lost my mother
Dead
I saw myself die

And no one said a word
She was everybody's favorite bisexual
Many had longed to kiss her but lips stayed pursed because they were all told to "stop snitching"

The t-shirts and memorial myspace pages do nothing to show how beautiful she really was
How her smile could brighten any room
How she never showed her sadness on the outside

Her smile
So wide that if that cheeba wrapped in a vanilla Dutch had hit her you could barely see her eyes
Squinty
I could always tell when she was high

And now she's high
Unless she visits me in dreams
Tricks my mind into believing she's back
Answering all the questions I've always wanted to ask

----
The words in italics are obviously not mine since I am alive. Those are her words as I interpret them, and then my words, as I feel them-about her.

It's an old saying, but it's true. If two friends have not talked for five years, it's neither of their faults, or both of their faults, depending on how you look at it. Friendship, like any type of relationship, contains two people and takes two people to make things work.

It amuses me to hear someone say "She hasn't called me in 2 years, I'm so upset, we're not friends anymore." Phones, e-mail, text messages, Facebook, they are all two-way communication devices. If she hasn't called, and you haven't called, who is to blame? There isn't really a person to blame, unless you blame both parties equally.

It's easy to put the blame of a lost friendship on the other person, but before you do, please examine your efforts, or lack thereof, in the friendship.

Now, if one person is continually attempting to make contact, talk, go out, etc., and the other person isn't responsive, that is when blame can be placed. Otherwise, pick up the phone, and start the ball rolling on rekindling your friendships.

Life is a hectic, busy, thing, and I do wish I had more time to keep up with my friends from all walks of life. I'll have to try harder.

Left 4 Dead 2 comes out today, but lucky as I am I had it yesterday and played well into the night. First, let me say I give the second version two thumbs up. Its everything that a game sequel should be. There are new zombie types, melee weapons, challenges, and (my favorite) new characters. I was so happy to see that one of the new characters was a Black woman, like me! 

Now, I played the first version happily, even without a Black woman avatar to choose from, and I would be playing the second version just as happily even if the new character (Rochelle) wasn't in the game. But it makes my gaming experience *that* much more fun to have a Black woman with locs as my avatar.